Question: My crew go out for beers most day after clocking out. Just a couple of beers we are not getting wasted. I think about those beers a lot like right from after lunch break I am dreaming about them and I think about them all day. Apparently this is not normal and this is a sign of alcoholism. I do not get drunk very often but I drink every day and I drink about 30 to 40 beers in an average week. All my friends drink more than I do but I think most are alkies. Does this sound like an alcohol problem?

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

Thinking about drinking is a sign of obsession over alcohol. That is a sign of possibly being a problem drinker. Stopping at two consistently usually means you are not. The "safe drinking guidelines" suggest never more than two in a day and never more than 14 in a week. If a person cannot drink and consistently follow this, the recommendation changes to abstinence. If you were to experiment with drinking with these guidelines for awhile and get back with me on your results, I could give you more feedback. I see the person as the expert on himself and I am just here to guide him.

Question: If drinking alcohol kills neurons in the brain is there any such thing as healthy drinking? If a person drinks 2 glasses of wine a day for 40 years that adds up to almost 30 000 alcoholic drinks by the time a person is 60, assuming they started drinking alcohol at around 20 years old. Wouldn’t having 30 000 alcoholic drinks be pretty bad for your brain by the time you got to the age at which you might start to have to worry about dementia and Alzheimers?

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

That is a very good question and I do not think the researchers have a good answer for that question. As far as the effects of larger amounts, yes, we know the impact. Here is a link to the current research put out by the National Institute on Health: National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa63/aa63.htm

My recommendation is if you are concerned about the neurological effects, abstain. The recommendations given for moderate drinking also recommend spacing drinks an hour or hour and a half apart which reduces the intoxication effect. This should decrease the chance that the alcohol will have a negative impact on the body in general. The current research supports two drinks per day, never more and fourteen drinks per week, never more up until age 65. After that, 2 drinks per day and never more than 7 in a week which indicates to me that as we age, the alcohol is impacting us, by I cannot say for sure. I am a happy abstainer.

Question: Dear Friend, I am a psychotherapist in South Jersey. Two years ago one of my clients in recovery struggled with how to explain alcoholism to his young daughter. He was concerned that she would hear from neighbors and family members that Daddy was a "drunk". After an unsuccessful search for the perfect children's book to help him and his daughter he asked me to write one. "Daddy's Disease" is the result. “Tommy doesn’t know why his father doesn’t show up for dinners, or soccer games or why he acts funny sometimes. Tommy thinks it’s because his father doesn’t want to be with him, that he hasn’t been the best boy he can be, that he should try harder. But, Mommy tells Tommy that Daddy has a disease called “alcoholism”. She helps Tommy, and his faithful dog Murphy, understand what this disease is and how it affects Daddy, and the whole family. She teaches Tommy that he is not responsible for Daddy’s behavior and that gives Tommy the peace he needs to foster a healthy childhood.” In an easily understood, beautifully illustrated style, "Daddy's Disease" helps families to navigate the difficult waters of alcoholism. It is my hope that you will consider making this information available for the many children and adults who have been struggling with this devastating disease. Please feel free to contact me at 856-296-3775 with any questions. I thank you for your time and consideration and for all the good work you do. Best, Carolyn Hannan Bell - www.alcoholismhurtskids.com

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

I will pass this information along and take a look at your book. I work with some child therapist who are always on the look out for tools to use with children, so I will pass along the information to them as well. I appreciate you reaching out to me and I apologize for the delay. There was a delay when I updated my license with the recredentialing process here on the site. Do you have this on Amazon and is it available in electronic format? If not, that could be a wonderful idea as well. So many children use the iPad and Kindle Fire these days and with automatic download, there is no wait for delivery.

Question: Lets say a man is going to have 10 drinks in a 24 hour day. Is it better for that person to have 10 drinks at night and then wake up hungover and recover until the evening when they start again or is it better for the person to have a drink starting right from the coffee in the morning and then slowly all day long so they keep their blood alcohol level low and steady rather than crashing up and down. Someone I care about does this but they do not believe they have a problem because they never get drunk and the damage to the body comes from drinking enough at once to get drunk.

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

The research on this says that a male who has more than 4 alcoholic beverages in a day, has higher rates of alcohol related problems. The problems that result from intoxication would be lessened or eliminated by drinking slowly all day long. Drinking early in the day doesn't make the person have a problem, but it is usually a sign that they have a problem. Anyone who cannot consistently drink two alcoholic beverages a day and never more could be considered to have a problem with alcohol. That includes me since I do not and cannot drink in this way. I have, but I hate it. I want to drink more if I drink so instead, I choose to abstain.

Question: How much is too much? My husband drinks a significant amount each day, and has admitted to as much as 15-30 cans of beer. Typically i think it's a minimum of 10 up to 15. How much longer can it last until he has some serious health issues? He's probably been doing this routine for as much as a year. Prior to that it was similar, but not as high of a daily number.

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

The research on alcohol goes back over 60 years. The research shows, for a non-addicted user of alcohol, two alcoholic beverages per day, does not lead to any problems. If a person drinks less than daily, up to three drinks per day. Not to exceed 14 drinks in one week, with no more than three on one day. A drink is defined as one half ounce of pure alcohol which can be found in one -12 ounce can of 4% alcohol beer, one, one-ounce shot of 100 proof distilled liquor or one 4-ounce glass of 12% alcohol wine. It is impossible to say how long a person can continue to drink at higher levels and not suffer consequences from the drinking. It is known that just one time exceeding these limits can cause physical damage to the body much like an overdose on any drug would do so.

Question: I thought everything was supposed too get better when I got sober. I have not had a drink in 87 days and now all that I have is being able to see clearly just how bad things are in my life and with my family and not having anything to take the edge off of bad feelings at the end of the day…

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

That is why there is a difference between abstinence and recovery. Abstinence is the step we take before recovery can begin. To be in recovery means we first learn to stop using (early recovery), next we learn techniques to help us cope (middle recovery) and later we put our life back together (late recovery). It is an ongoing process. Facing the damage to our lives and the realities in our lives is what makes it hard to recover. You are on the cusp of the first 90 days which is your first hallmark. You don't say if you are getting or seeking any help. Reach out. Go to counseling or self-help group like AA.

Question: What do you say to someone who is becoming an alcoholic that is a musician and a poet and writer and who is really talented who claims that they need drinking and drugs as part of their creative process and that most great artists use substances to uncork the mind....his words not mine? It is my brother and he idealizes this tortured artist persona but I think it is more like he needs to drink so he uses his art as a way to do that. He is very talented but he is not making a living with it. He lives with my parents and he is 32.

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

This is actually a common reason people have and or give to use substances. I am unsure that I can appropriately tell you how to help him connect his use to the negative outcomes in his life.

The technique of Motivational Interviewing is the best way to do that and it does take training and experience.

If he enters into a dialogue with you about it, you may simply ask him if he connects his use with any stuff in his life that he is not completely happy with. Not engaging his defensiveness and need to protect his use is the best way to at least get him to start thinking about it and talking about it. Talk to him about his goals for the future in a way that does not make him feel judged. It is his life. If your parents aren't happy with him living there, it is there place to tell him. Be honest with him if he is open to your opinion.

Question: I was just on the women for sobriety website. Some of their steps are: I have a life-threatening problem that once had me. I now take charge of my life and my disease. I accept the responsibility. Problems bother me only to the degree I permit them to. I now better understand my problems and do not permit problems to overwhelm me. I am what I think. I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman. Happiness is a habit I will develop. Happiness is created, not waited for…this is very different from the 12 steps program and that appeals to me. I am a long time heavy drinker. I have been to AA meetings before. Are you familiar with women for sobriety? Is this an effective program to get involved with?

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

I have heard of Women In Sobriety, but more importantly, I believe in the type of reframing/ reprogramming that this question lists and attributes to Women In Sobriety. There is a branch of Psychology known as Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP for short) that does exactly what these "steps" are doing. The concept of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is to recognize how thoughts lead to emotions and emotions to behaviors and help you change your thoughts, usually to thoughts that are more positive or rational. NLP takes this a step further to have you ask yourself whether a thought while true is helpful to think given your goals in life.

For example, if you think "I am an alcoholic", in AA this may be labeled the "first step" "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol and our life had become unmanageable" and in NLP, this would be taken further to ask "how is that thought helpful, even if it is true"? So for example, if believing you were an alcoholic and therefore doomed to drink forever and your goal was to stop, that would not be a helpful thought and you would reframe it. (I am an alcoholic who can stop drinking by going to AA, working the steps and abstaining from alcohol). If you thought, "I am an alcoholic and therefore since I am, I have an allergy to alcohol" and that HELPS you CHOOSE and DECIDE not to drink alcohol because of that, then it would be helpful thought that heads you toward your goal of sobriety.

In summary, taking charge of your thought life (and only the individual can do that, no one else is responsible or can be for that inner dialogue we all have) is VERY useful both in recovery and life in general.

Question: I have been drinking on the weekends for 15 years. I am 32 now. All of a sudden, just over the last few months, I am starting to have blackouts where I don’t remember anything for hours of time from when I was drunk. I know this is happens to people but why its just starting to happen to me now? I am not drinking any more or any differently than I used to but now it is affecting me in such a different way. Does this mean I am becoming an alcoholic? I almost never drink more than a beer or 2 during the week. On weekends I will have about a 12 pack both nights.

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

Blackouts are a symptom of progression of the disease of alcohol dependence.  The only way for you to know if you have progressed to dependency in the brain is to cut back to the same amount on weekends as you drink during the week.  If you drink two standard drinks as often as every day and never more, your tolerance will go back down, the blackouts will stop and you will reduce your risk for a problem.  If you attempt to drink less on weekends, but your mind (thoughts, rationalizations, excuses, etc.etc.etc) keeps telling you to go ahead and have more, then you have at least developed psychological dependence to alcohol.  This is a state in which the alcohol has taken on more importance than just a beverage.  It is you help to relax, your reward, your companion, your fun, etc. etc. etc.  A safe bet would be to stop all together if you can't limit your use to just two a day or three if you drink less than daily.  This is based on research published by the Prevention Research Institute (PRI). 

Question: Assuming a person is not willing to stop drinking or even reduce their drinking by much. Is there any harm reduction techniques that they can do to minimize the physical and mental damage that is associated with alcoholism. IE: diet or nutrition strategies, certain supplements or medications that cleanse the liver etc. etc.

Jennifer Hamilton Says...:

I really cannot answer that question.  I think you would be best to address it to a physician on here or one you see.  I am unaware of anything that would have a true benefit or truly counteract the negative effects of alcohol.  I was taught that just one time a year of getting drunk has enough bad effects to counter act any good effects of drinking a small amount that you hear about, i.e., those who drink a small amount may live longer or have better kidney function.  Alcohol is so toxic in amounts above two standard drinks (that is one 12 ounce beer, one 4-5 ounce glass of 12% wine or one 1.5 ounce shot of 80 proof liquor) per day.  I am sorry I cannot be more help.  I certainly think that taking steps to do things that are healthy will not hurt, such as eat nutritious foods (alcohol users often are malnourished), exercising and taking vitamins.  However, it may not be any help in stopping the damage caused by alcohol.