Question: What do you think about the Dr. Daniel Amen method for adult ADHD? I have heard some really amazing things about the progress one of my friends’ sons made and my son is 24 and really directionless and unemployed. He is a creative genius and amazing artist. If he could stay focused on completing a series of paintings he already has preapproval for a show at a major gallery. The problem is he can’t get it done and this is so frustrating to him and to all of us. We have tried every ADHD medication out there and they only help a small amount so he is not sure they are worth the side effects and since they don’t help I wonder if his ADHD diagnosis is not 100% accurate. This is why the idea of really comprehensive brain scans to find out what is going on in there sounds like exactly what we need to do.

Loren Gelberg-Goff Says...:

Excellent question, and I certainly admire and appreciate Dr. Amen's work and the way in which he can really get to the root of one's problems... I agree that your son may need to be fully evaluated and assessed to see what is really going on for him. As is often the case, individuals who may have had ADD/ADHD growing up and didn't have really good outcomes with whatever medications or treatment modalities were used, carry negative beliefs about themselves as they mature. These negative self-images do a lot to sabotage &/or undermine their successes in their adult lives. So, while having your son evaluated is a great idea, I'd also explore having him work with a good therapist who can help him get to the emotional source of his sabotage and inability to complete what he starts. 

Please look into Emotional Freedom Therapy (EFT)  This has been shown to be very beneficial for breaking through internal barriers. If you haven't already done neurofeedback, then I would STRONGLY recommend that your son do neurofeedback. It's an extraordinary therapy that truly benefits people with ADD/ADHD, problems with focusing, etc.  

I understand your concern and frustration for your son, and it is important that he be engaged in this process as well. Since many people are so used to feeling stuck because that has been their pattern, they often just shut down to new ideas and possibilities, leaving you to be the one who is pushing, cajoling, and begging. How engaged is your son in wanting to do something different in his life? There are many factors here that both you and he can explore together, but he needs to be at least as engaged in this process as you are to have the success you are looking for and that he deserves.

I hope that these few suggestions and recommendations are helpful as places to start. Dr. Amen is certainly an awesome resource, and you have other possibilities as well... Please feel free to contact me should you have any other questions or concerns and I'll do my best to provide you with further guidance. Wishing you and your son all the best.

Question: I have ADD. I am 16. I was tested by a psychiatrist last year. I have a prescription for ritalin and I am supposed to take it before breakfast and lunch. I have been using it for almost a year. I don’t think it helps me at all. Does this mean I don’t have ADD? Does taking this medicine harm my brain if I don’t have ADD? My parents say I should take it but I am not sure.

Loren Gelberg-Goff Says...:

Great question... just because Ritalin doesn't work for you, it doesn't mean you don't have ADD... There are many facets to ADD and therefore many ways to address the symptoms.  If you find that Ritalin isn't working for you, there are other options as far as medications go that can be helpful.  Sometimes it's a matter of finding the right medication for you based on how your body responds.

Alternatively, you can explore other treatment modalities that are helpful, beneficial and effective in treating ADD

1. Neurofeedback: shown to be very helpful in increasing focus, attention span, reducing agitation, etc.

2. Meditation: Increases your abilities to be relaxed, calm, centered, focused and relaxed.

3. Biofeedback... teaches you internal control strategies and helps you to learn how to monitor your own reactions and responses to situations that trigger certain ADD behaviors. 

4. Nutritional counseling Often many symptoms of ADD have roots in nutrition and food choices.  Definitely worth looking into to see how you may be reacting/allergic to certain foods that can trigger ADD symptoms and behaviors.

5. Organization and time management strategies... it's always beneficial to change certain behaviors that keep you stuck in sabotaging behaviors so that you can confidently move forward... these are new coping skills so that your ADD doesn't control your life.

The advantage of neurofeedback over the other modalities is that you show up for sessions and do not have to "practice" anything in between sessions.  Since both meditation and biofeedback require ongoing practice (and they are definitely worthwhile practices) and it may not be something you are ready for, neurofeedback provides an internal shift during the sessions that are cumulative.  You simply need to show up regularly for your appointments. Additionally, while organizational counseling with someone who specializes in working with people with ADD  and nutrition counseling(with a nutritionist or naturopath who is experienced in dealing with ADD) is also truly worthwhile you and your parents need to choose what you are willing to participate in that will move you forward in a positive way in your life. 

Please contact me if you have any additional questions.  I can make referrals for professionals in the above areas if you are in NJ, but google, and recommendations from your dr. chiropractor, school counselor will also be helpful resources.  All the best, Loren

Question: I have adhd and I dropped out of high school 3 years ago, got into drugs and drinking and haven’t really had a good job ever in my life. I am not good looking and I am fat. I still live at home with my mom and dad. I am trying to stay off drugs but it is hard. I go to a group meeting with some other people twice a week. I have to go by the court. They say I have low self esteem and that is why I use drugs. I think this is true. How can I raise my self esteem? Especially when I think I have very good reasons to have low self esteem, like not being very smart or pretty or anything very good.

Loren Gelberg-Goff Says...:

OK... first things first... you do have the ability to change your attitude toward yourself... You have the ability to see yourself through a different lens.  I hear you whining about your life, and that never gets anyone anywhere except deeper in a hole.  So, the good news is you decided to write in for some assistance... that's step 1... the next step is you deciding to act on the advice you are given.  That's within your control. 

While staying clean and off drugs feels hard, please give yourself kudos for staying off drugs!  Excellent!

Saying you're fat and ugly is certainly a good way of undermining your self-esteem... I want you to look within yourself and find 5 things that are beautiful about you... it might be your sense of humor, your willingness to listen to friends, your strength to stay off drugs, your willingness to ask for help, being a loving daughter, etc... Look for your inner qualities that you have (and yes, even without meeting you, I am sure you have them...) that are beautiful...

What are you looking for?  What are your goals?  It's hard to move forward in your life if you haven't crystallized your goals and desires...

I would strongly recommend therapy, and not just therapy for addictions, but therapy to help you understand how to cope with your ADHD, self-image issues and what your coping skills are in your life so that you can make them more effective and positive...Your message sounds like you are also depressed, and this needs to be addressed in therapy as well.

You say that you are fat... You can get up and take walks everyday... do something physical to at least get you moving and out of the apparent slump that you are in...

I don't know where you live, but finding a good therapist is easier these days with the help of the Internet... after all, you found this site and are reaching out here. 

I have a practice in Northern NJ, and will be starting a virtual group later this summer focusing on self-esteem...

You might also look into doing neurofeedback, which has been shown to be very helpful in dealing with ADHD... (If you are not familiar with it, you can get info on it at www.eeginfo.com ) 

While you have a number of issues that you feel are holding you back, they no longer have to hold sway over your life... You can take back your power and live knowing you really are well within...Know that you are are worth fighting for...

I hope that this gives you some food for thought and some ideas for direction you can take to change your life.  Please let me know if I can be of further assistance... Loren M. Gelberg-Goff, LCSW  (www.beingwellwithin.com)