Question: I have two kids that are 2 and 4. Don’t know what to do. I am a crackhead and I can’t stop myself anymore I spend my checks until they are gone and then the feeling I have when I smoke that last rock is so horrible. I was the one who used to hold my boyfriends money and I always thought I’d never turn into an addict like he was. I could always just smoke one day a week or two but now it is like binge 24-7. I have no money no family to turn to no friends I can trust and I need help cuz I can’t stop even though I hate it so much. I have no money so I have to go to the mission or human services for treatment but I am so scared that if I do that the first thing they will do is come and take my kids away. I know someone who went in to ask about help and 2 days later social workers came and took her kids away and she wasn’t even that bad.

Florence Cameron Says...:

Dear Mother,

You've crossed over to the addicted person you said you'd never become. This is all too common and furthermore, a tragedy. If you love your kids you would seek help immediately and find a safe place for your children to stay. You have lost complete control and this is child abuse and child neglect in the full sense of the word. All your money goes towards drugs, finding them, doing them and recovering from them. These children need to be taken from you, because you have taken your hands off the wheel of your life and the life of your children. I urge you to do the right thing for your children, as this will affect them negatively. You are thinking of yourself only. If you have a shred of concern for those children you will see that they are with people who can give them what you cannot; love, security, the basic necessities: a bed, food, clean clothes and a calm mind. These children need someone who cares for them, not someone who puts drugs before them.

It is time for you to do the right thing. These kids are helpless and depend on you for everything and you can't be there for yourself much less for anyone else. Reach out to family for your children's sake and then go get help. If you are sick and tired of living this way then change it. You are the only one who can. Happiness is an inside job.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC, LCAP

Naples, FL

Question: Does molly come as a rock like crack cocaine? How bad is it for you compared to other drugs? I found some in my sons school bag and he says he got it at school for a party on the weekend and he is just holding it for his friends. Thought it was crack and I was so scared but he said it was just molly which is like E. I am at the edge of losing my mind with worry about this boy and there is nothing I can do or say to get through to him because he has more money than I do. I have taken away all privileges and he doesn’t care because whatever I can take from him he seems to just be able to get from his friends or he buys for himself from money his dad gives him. He does work for it in my ex husbands restaurant but he gets far more than he should so he can afford to party all the time when I have to work two jobs to pay the bills.

Florence Cameron Says...:

Dear mom, my heart goes out to you as this is a too familiar scenario across our country.

The fact that your son is "holding" drugs for a friend and so familiar with the "street names" tells me he has access to a broad range of drugs. When teenagers use drugs and/or alcohol, it is better to overreact then to under-react. The prefrontal cortex of the brain is continuing to mature and doesn't complete this process until around age 25. Introducing drugs and alcohol to an immature brain changes it's neurochemistry in deleterious ways. Your son displays behavior serious enough to seek professional help. Interventions to disrupt disturbed, irrational, reckless and illegal behavior is called for at this junction. If not now when? How many more years do you have to show him you care enough to do whatever you can to help him. After he reaches eighteen you will have little recourse except to disengage, or watch the train wreck. As an adult he will become solely responsible for his own behavior. Not knowing his age or any other specific details about the situation, I cannot reliably predict what you are in for; unfortunately when you deal with drugs and alcohol it will always be unpredictable.

From what I understand, your son is from a broken home. He seems to be more influenced by his peers which he is around more than his parents. Meanwhile, you are working two jobs in order to support your family, and his father gives him more money than his job deserves- possibly to soothe his own emotional guilt for the dissolution of the family unit. Unfortunately, this is a formula for disaster. Your son needs nothing more than the attention, guidance and the emotional comfort of his parents. Adolescents, by nature, seek out groups or "clicks" in order to "fit in" when their world turns upside down. Many times these groups are made up of other adolescents from broken homes seeking escape from emotional pain. Drugs and alcohol provide immediate relief and tantalize the pleasure-reward centers of the brain nurturing and ushering in these "developing teenagers" to the life of addiction. While intoxicated on substances, the brain's capacity to make rational choices and decisions is compromised-ultimately making one behave recklessly and out of control.

Perhaps you and your ex-husband can unite in the best interest of your son and seek professional help that can guide you to the resources that are needed, so that your son can find his way in this life without resorting to substances to escape his emotional pain. There are excellent programs available that could help your son restart his life.

Do your "due diligence" and educate yourself on the negative, long-term effects of substance abuse. I've been in this business for quite some time and I have never seen one success story from continued use. The younger the person starts using drugs and alcohol the more likely they will become dependent on them and have long-lasting behavioral and emotional problems. Addiction becomes a disease for the user, as well as for the family as no one will come out unscathed. You owe it to yourself to do what you can while you have an opportunity, otherwise you may be dealing with this child for the rest of your life.

Best of luck

Jeannie Cameron

Naples, FL

Question: I have used Cocaine off and on for many years< but after my last binge, i cant get over the depression. I have always been able to get back to work. I dont know what to do, i dont have insurance and every place i called requires it. What can i do?

Florence Cameron Says...:

And hence the dilemma. "I have used cocaine on and off for many years but after my last binge" . . . . This is the story of so many lives. The threshold between recreational use and dependence of substances and alcohol is unclear and different for everyone. One person may go many years living a "sub-normal state" and continue using until those "mental and emotional resources" are depleted, which is what I hear you describing in your "symptom of depression". And then another person's bio-chemistry is such that one use of certain drugs (cocaine being one) where a second chance isn't an option. Some will lose their life, have bio-chemistry that causes increased sensitivity, or depletion. Putting it bluntly, if one uses they make a short-term decision that can become permanent.

You found the money to acquire the cocaine when you wanted it. I think you are worth acquiring the money needed to seek help. At this point in the game of "roulette drug use" you've lost the ability and distinction to make rational choices and therefore your important brain systems are malfunctioning. Only with the help of skilled professionals; doctors and addiction counselors, and most importantly.........an intrinsic desire on your part to get better, rather than just getting by will things change. If nothing changes...nothing changes.

All Americans are now required to have insurance under the newly formed plan. There will be a financial penalty held against them from the IRS yearly if not. I suggest to you that you put your hands back on the wheel of your life and get back on the road again. The alternative ........my friend is bleak.

Choose The Next Right Thing!

Jeannie Cameron, MS, NCC, LMHC

Naples, FL

Question: Hi cannabis resin is not weed its the solid type you burn and put into a joint the depression is still with me now its been 6 months since i quit.I do feel scared & lonely a lot just wanted to know if this is to do with quitting the cannabis and will that scared feeling go away. I am seeing my community mental health team and a councilor the depression just started around 28th december 2012 thats when i quit smoking the cannabis.

Florence Cameron Says...:

It has been 6 months since you discontinued the use of marijuana and have recurring depression and anxiety with suicidal thoughts. I do not think that the depression you are feeling is due to THC withdrawal alone, unless it is psychological dependence and you are having a hard time finding enjoyment in any other activities. Keep your treatment team aware of your mood changes and of your suicidal ideations. This is extremely important, as they can adjust your medications for effectiveness. Try and find something you enjoy doing to occupy your time and keep distracted. The more you focus on your problems the bigger they become. What we pay attention to we draw to us. Try to challenge your critical inner voice and instead affirm your strengths and positive attributes.

Thank you for responding and giving me more information.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC

Naples, FL

Question: Hi i gave up smoking cannabis resin nearly 6 months ago but i did have one joint 3 months ago.Im still going through depression with anxiety i have suffered depression & anxiety in the past.I feel very alone and scared is this anything to do with withdrwals.I am diagnosed with agoraphobia and ocd I feel scared quiet a lot the depression is bad and i have suicidle thoughts.Ive quit the cannabis before years ago for a few years then started again for around 3 years before i quit this time.

Florence Cameron Says...:

Please seek help immediately. Call 911, go to the nearest emergency room, or mental health clinic. You can also call The National Suicide Crisis Line 800-273-8255. If you are outside the US please seek your local resources.

I'm not sure of your description "cannabis resin." However if you have used the trending-high chemicals that mimic THC called Spice then it is imperative you seek help as soon as possible. These chemicals and it's derivatives have been known to have very negative affects on the brain which can be long lasting. IT IS NEVER a good idea to ingest unknown chemicals in your body, as it changes brain chemistry too.

You stated that you were having suicidal ideations, feel depressed and anxious and have been diagnosed with OCD and Agoraphobia. This is not a stable situation. Please seek help Immediately.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC

Naples, FL

Question: Does Spice legal high cause long term memory problems and if it does how long does it take before you start to get your memory back. I was a pretty regular user until the fall and I started noticing that my memory was getting really effected and I also was feeling really jumpy and paranoid. So I stopped using and I thought I would get my memory back but it has not happened even 6 months later I feel just as slow and forgetful as if I was smoking every day. But I do not feel as paranoid anymore. I think this is really bad stuff. Its funny (sad funny) I would probably have been much better off just using regular marijuana but I couldn’t because of drug testing so I had to use this nasty chemical stuff that’s messed me up. Sucks to be me.

Florence Cameron Says...:

Here in Florida Spice is not legal because of the deleterious side effects from it's use. Many people have had to visit the emergency room after using Spice and many have had negative experiences prompting state regulations to shut down the sell of Spice and it's similar antecedent chemical components. Man made substances are usually much more potent than our own psycho-pharmacology and/or natural substances. It is never good to ingest designer drugs for obvious reasons; there is no longitudinal studies on them to know the harmful effects. You were the rat lab in this case and it is never worth the risk. I hope the best for you.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC

Naples, FL

Question: what is necessary for a drug/alcohol treatment program to accept insurance in South Carolina?

Florence Cameron Says...:

Mr. Bibb,

Normally calling your insurance company, or going to their website will give you information that will lead to more knowledge about your coverage and if alcohol/drug treatment programs are covered. Also, browsing treatment programs online, and making a few calls can determine if certain treatment programs accept your insurance. If your insurance doesn't cover treatment, there are non-profit programs that will charge according to a "household income" sliding scale. Outpatient programs are another option, as are AA, and SMART programs. Regardless of insurance, sobriety is invaluable and an investment in your life. What are you worth? How much money did you spend on alcohol/drugs getting to this point? Being in Florida and not savvy of the laws in South Carolina I wish you all the best.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC

Naples, FL

Question: Can a treatment facility refuse treatment to an addict due to past failed attempts at program completion?

Florence Cameron Says...:

That is a good question. Treatment facilities have the right to refuse treatment to individuals based on a number of factors. If an individual refuses to comply with program rules, leaves the program against medical advice (AMA), then re-entry could be difficult.

Not knowing the specifics I cannot speak to your particular case. However, there are other programs and if an individual continues to fail at one program it would make sense to try another one.

The reality is that sobriety is the goal, regardless of where you can find it. Also, the individual must be willing to do the work. Treatment programs are not a vacation. The schedule and routine, along with the education components and group engagement can be quite arduous. However, when one is at the brink of losing everything they have, including their life, the work is well worth it and individuals embrace it.

When an individual is not ready and resists the program, it makes it hard for the others to stay motivated. In such cases it is up to the staff to decide if the individual that is going through the motions and taking space, or creating havoc should leave the program to afford the space for another that is ready to change their life. Hope I was able to shed light on your question.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC

Naples, FL

Question: I live in Des Moines. I am a long time recreational drug user, smoker and social drinker. I am not addicted to anything other than cigarettes but I ingest some sort of intoxicating substance pretty much every day. I have just turned 40 and I have had also just had a health scare so I made a promise to myself to stop smoking and drinking and drugs. Unfortunately I am finding it a lot harder than I thought I would. I have been trying for about 2 months and I have probably only abstained on half of the past 60 nights…so not exactly a great track record so far. I think I could use some help with this but other than rehab (which seems like over-kill) or AA (which does not fit me at all) I am not really sure where to look for help with this. I would welcome suggestions from you about what type of assistance fits someone in my position.

Florence Cameron Says...:

Dear Des Moines,

I hear that you want to stop smoking, drinking and drugs and that is commendable of you. Your recent health scare at your age has ignited a desire for good health. However, trying to stop everything all at once is probably not realistic. Many of my clients’ prefer to wait until they have their alcohol and drug dependence abated before they take on the task of stopping cigarettes.

Your best efforts have not produced the results you want. The mere fact that you are finding it hard to stop by yourself tells me that you have built up dependence to your drug use. You weren't specific as to the quantity you use in drugs or drink, but the fact that you stated you use "some form of intoxicating substance daily" reveals dependency along with the fact that you can't stop on your own.

I know you don't refer or see yourself as having an addiction; however I would like to give you the criteria for substance dependence as set forth by the DSM-IV-TR, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Health Disorders. This manual is governed by WHO, the World Health Organization and all healthcare providers, world-wide, use this criterion in determining diagnoses. The following is the criterion for substance dependence and is referring to drugs or alcohol and any chemicals that has mind or mood altering affects. If you agree to experiencing 3 or more of the following symptoms within the last 12 months, then any treatment provider would diagnose substance dependence:

1. Continued use of alcohol even when significant problems related to its use have developed.
2. Increased tolerance or need for increased amounts of substance to attain the desired effect.
3. Withdrawal symptoms with decreased use.
4. Unsuccessful efforts to decrease use on own.
5. Increase in time spent in activities to obtain substances.
6. Withdrawal from social and recreational activities because of using, being intoxicated, or withdrawing
7. And continued use of substance even with awareness of physical or psychological problems encountered by the extent of substance use.

As far as what to do from here is challenging. Some people get so sick and tired of being sick and tired that there is nothing they wouldn't do to get sober. You, on the other hand state you don't want to go into a rehab or attend AA. The truth is that these venues of sobriety are reliable, available and affordable. A rehab will help you detox safely while being in the midst of others going through the same experience. This is powerful because it helps to normalize your situation. You will hear stories of other's and their personal battles as well as learning invaluable coping skills that will help you substitute healthy habits while breaking these life threatening habits. The people of AA, NA, CA etc. are made up of people just like you, that are trying to stay sober. These fellowships of like individuals keep their sobriety by giving back to others, helping others to sobriety. Distorted beliefs and perceptions can get in our way.

Whatever negative beliefs you hold about rehab or the 12-Step Program may be holding you back from getting the help you need. Getting sober is about you and you must want sobriety before it can work. Substance dependence is addiction and Addiction is a brain disease and trying to do this yourself is not viable at this point, you need professionals to help you. 

Please see your doctor and be honest with him/her about the substances you take and let them help you work out what would be best for you. 

I wish you all the best in your endeavors.

Jeannie Cameron, LMHC

www.jcameronlmhc.com

Naples, FL

Question: I did a lot of drugs and a lot of drinking for the past 10 years. I screwed up a lot of things over that time but one of my biggest regrets is that there is so much that happened that I don’t remember. My kids are 7 and 9 now and I can barely remember anything about there early childhood and that makes me so sad I want to cry. Is there any possibility that some of my memories will come back to me as I get more clean time? I am 6 weeks into recovery now.

Florence Cameron Says...:

First of all congratulations on making the choice to get sober!

This is a very fragile time in your recovery, Many feelings that you were repressing with your using are now surfacing. It is these feelings that send many people back to their drug of choice as they never developed any other coping skills then to escape with drugs and alcohol. You have an opportunity now to make some positive and lasting memories that unfortunately you forfeited with your drug use. Your recovery program should help you "let go of the past" as there is nothing you can do about it now. Yes there will be somethings you will remember and those things will perhaps cause you shame and guilt, however, this will be counter-productive to your sobriety. 

Your children are still young enough to benefit from a father that will be emotionally available to them. However you still have a lot of healing to do yourself, and approaching life one day, or one minute at a time is crucial. Let your sponsor help you stop rewinding the "old tapes" and get busy writing a new script for your life. All the best.

Jeannie Cameron, NCC, LMHC

www.jcameronlmhc.com

Naples, FL