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by E W
Counselor/Therapist

A few generations ago, it seems that for many people the trend was to graduate from high school, get married, and have kids. Then it moved to graduate from high school, go to college, marry high school sweetheart or college honey, move in together or get married, and have kids.  These days, with the tough economy, higher educational requirements, and fewer job opportunities, many college graduates are still living a single life but longing for a mate or a date. But without the resource-rich campus life, how does one find love?

Finding Love - Get out There!

So much has changed so quickly in our electronic age.  We can have 1000 friends and yet be lonelier than ever.  We can tweet our deepest thoughts to the entire twitterverse, but not be able to find that one special person with whom to share our most intimate selves.  Often left with no further social pool than our co-workers, and being that office romances are not always wise nor practical, where do we look for friends, socializing and potential dates?

Join a Group

Go places and join groups that involve the life you want to live.  If you would want a mate to go to church - then don't wait, join a church.  Many churches have singles groups and "after college" young adult groups.  If you would want to be involved in community volunteering - then don't wait, start helping out.  There's no guarantee you will meet that special someone, but you will meet people with interests similar to yours and lifestyles similar to your goals. 

Follow Your Interests

Ever wanted to try a new hobby?  Marriages and families can require a large amount of time, so if there are things you want to try, now is the time.  With fewer extra scheduling requirements, there may be more ability to really get adventurous, travel, try new things.  This will also put you in potential situations to meet like minded people, or just a wide variety of people.  Nurture and cultivate your own interests and if nothing else, you can find people who also enjoy those interests.

Online Dating?

More conventional avenues such as bar hopping, night clubs and dating services can help as well. (Always be cautious, go out in groups, meet in public places, and follow good privacy practices, especially with online dating.)  Meet-ups, exercise clubs, book clubs, and special topic groups (photography, astronomy, foreign films, sci-fi fans, etc) can also contain a variety of people ready to meet and greet.

The bottom line - Go out and be open to living a happy life.  Whatever you do, if you go with an open mind and ready friendship, and you just live a happy life, then even if you don't meet that special someone right away, you have already lived the life you wanted, and happily.  

 

About the author E W:
From Victim Advocacy with survivors of abuse and violence, case management with senior citizens and their families, counseling with at-risk youth and their families, to therapy with adults fighting addiction - bereavement, depression, relationship issues, parenting issues, divorce, blended families, disability, career changes, life changes, my professional experience has encountered it all (so to speak). Fitness, health, coping with chronic illness, aging parents, raising children, job loss, job stress,.... and the list goes on!
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Page last updated Aug 26, 2013

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