Reality & Fantasy

My question to you would be - what does porn provide that reality does not?

The fantasies involved with pornography do not have to be an obstacle to satisfying sex and emotional intimacy.

It feels like there's something more substantive that's blocking intimacy.

Is this a conclusion and direction you've chosen on your own or have you involved your wife in discussions of improving your marriage, intimacy, sex?

The instant gratification of meeting your own needs is always available to you...avoiding that temptation is not realistic. Making a choice to invest in your marriage is available and getting to the heart of the matter sounds like what's needed.

Talk with your wife about what you want and see what you can do together. Feel free to ask me follow up questions and I'm happy to offer suggestions - simply avoiding instant gratification that is always at your fingertips feels like a losing battle.