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Depression: How Partners Can Help

answered 08:54 AM EST, Wed July 18, 2012
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anonymous anonymous
My fiancee has depression. She is on medication and she says it is helping her but all she ever wants to do is sleep all the time whenever she doesn't absolutely have to go to work. I am not sure if I should push her to do more or if I should leave her alone to 'heal' on her own terms.

Shannon Rice Says...

Many people actually get more fatigue when they are on an anti-depressant.  I would suggest that your fiance address her desire to sleep excessively with her medication provider.  Additionally, I would suggest that if you fiance is not in psychotherapy that she find a good CBT practitioner.  Many behavioral methods can help cope with symptoms of depression.  I understand that you are unsure of how to help your fiance.

You are in a difficult position.  If you push her, she may get angry or annoyed with you.  If you don't say/do anything, you may feel frustrated with her. Unfortunately, you have no control over the way your fiance copes with her symptoms.

Your best position is one of providing support and encouragement.  It may be helpful to encourage your fiance to be more active, but back-off if she indicates she will not do it.  You may also  look into getting info about depression from a book or even a support group.  It is helpful to be informed when you are supporting a loved one.  

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Page last updated Jul 18, 2012

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Shannon Rice - LCSW-R
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