At a party this weekend some guy who had heard I was a tough guy wanted to make some trouble for me and started calling me names. I tried to ignore him but after a while I asked him to stop and when he wouldn’t I lost control but this time I grabbed a steak knife that was on the counter and stabbed him in the leg and then he and friends took off.
I am worried now because I already have one assault charge and I don’t know if I am going to get charged again for stabbing him, even though he started it. I am also worried because I so totally lost control and I never meant to stab anyone and it just happened in the heat of the moment. I’ve got to learn how to control myself. I kind of like my tough guy reputation but I do not want to go to jail and I can see that if I don’t learn to control myself that is where I am going to end up.
Dr. John Gorvin Says...
You are correct that this is important to address immediately.
Focus on controlling this – what are specific things you can do to stop the escalation of your anger?
- Walk away (when you say you tried to ignore it, that is when you walk away – create distance between you and the instigator).
- Count to 10 (or 100) before you say or do anything
- Take deep breaths
What will help you remember the consequences of your actions before you act?
I suggest you go to counseling immediately to learn why you act this way, and to learn ways to cope and control it. You also should have a psychiatric consultation to see if there are medications that can help you be calmer and in control
I also recommend a full psychological evaluation to rule out that you any mood based disorder or anxiety disorder, and this will help focus and direct your treatment
Page last updated Nov 02, 2011